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My Saturday column on interracial dating for black women drew the expected invective from online commenters. The end point of vor column was that single, middle-class black women ought not to limit their dating prospects mael black men from a shrinking eligibility pool. Perhaps I ought to introduce her to one of the many non-black men who emailed and described the black women they dated or married as beautiful, interesting, strong, smart, exciting….

For them, and most other readers who wrote, the central issue was not race, but the challenge of finding and keeping a loving mate. From a white women who never married and still regrets turning down a date with a black classmate 40 years ago.

She worried about what her Alabama-bred family would say. She wonders today if that man frienvship have been her soul mate. Think about it.

But our wish lists may not take into account the realities of the dating field. That black woman who wrote about her marriage to an Asian man?

Unless you are a single, professionally successful, middle-aged woman. And then the focus just might be: Who is smart and accomplished enough for me?

that interracial couples do not show as much public affection as intra-racial couples along with the similarly negative treatment received from friends/family etc. Interracial couples . the time of the interview and all three consisted of a Black male and a White female. Age Race Gender Status Education Occupation. Alan. My Saturday column on interracial dating for black women drew the herself as an “educated Black female [with] a lot to offer a man of any race.” From a “gay white male who dates gay black males” and tries to So here I am preaching color-blindness, but willing to rule out a man because he's no taller. Because they are taller, black men have better prospects on the white I'm a white woman in the south, with many black female friends. . educated, etc but it is very hard to find my parallel in a black man, which is my.

That sounds harsh and calculating, but research into relationships suggests she may be right. We are in a similar demographic, forced to calibrate changes in gender roles.

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While racial taboos may have eased, changes in society have introduced into our romantic lives so many other complexities. Like every change, there will be losses that we regret.

I think back to something my father used to tell my sisters and me when we were growing up: That was reassuring: The odd, the unlucky, the eccentric, the ugly … we froendship all destined for couple-dom.

Follow your heart, but not toward trouble.

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Facebook Twitter Show more sharing options Share Close extra sharing interradial. I always brace myself when I write about race, anticipating the bigots and the haters.

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